This has been the shortest year of my life. What a special baby you are. Seems just yesterday I was telling that nurse, that I had an appointment and that I wasn't leaving the hospital until I had this baby - you were a bit reluctant to come into this word.
I remember your Dada having the most worried but loving look on his face as he looked at you when the nurses were working on getting all that stuff out of your lungs. The NICU Dr. asked if he wanted to hold his son and your Dada replied "he needs his mama" (tears). Holding you for those 60 seconds was wonderful but worrisome all at the same time. I can still hear that rattle in your lungs as you fussed a little. I wanted to hold you forever, but you weren't well and needed to go with the doctors. Your Dada stayed with you, held your little hand and put his warm loving hands on your head and feet to calm you and let you know he was there and everything was going to be ok. I didn't get to see you again for 2.5 hours!! I was sick with worry and exhaustion. Your Gramma (mom), stayed with me, cried tears of joy with me and talked me through my worries. I was so happy to have you back in my arms, breathing well and so very willing to nurse!
At the hospital, I'll never forget waking up from just a little sleep, knowing beyond a doubt that I was hearing your cry as the nurse wheeled you down the hallway because you needed me. I remember spilling Jimmy Johns lettuce, tomatoes and avacado (Beach Club) all over you because I wanted to hold you and eat. Your Honey (Deb True or Momma True as I loving call her) brought me Harry's Apple and Blue Cheese salad - I had missed blue cheese and had been craving this particular salad for MONTHS! Aunt Sara, just last month said it was one of the best salads she'd ever had!
That summer had been one of the hottest summers on record and in just a day or two the temperate plummeted and it rained most every day we were at the hospital.
The sun is just coming up today (November 5) and we have a slew of people coming over today to really celebrate your first birthday. Dean life is complicated - it will make you literally jump with excitement one day and break down with tears the next; I especially love the moments that God's presence overwhelms me to the point I have to remember to breathe. You've given me all of these moments and I will treasure and love you forever.
I Love You,
Mama.
P.S. Thank you for the kiss the other day, after I said "I love you" - it seemed you said I love you too.
http://goodtobetruefarm.blogspot.com/2010/11/vote-for-dean.html - reminisce with me from 1 year ago!
Now here's you eating your birthday cake - no frosting yet...
{Dean} Oh my I think this sugar is going to my head...how much of this stuff are they going to let me eat!
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